Sunday, June 7, 2009

Such high aspirations crash quickly.

Just re-read my last post. I am a lazy, lazy person. Well, not lazy really, just struggling to maintain momentum. And then my cousins baby died, and I've been struggling with that much more than I should considering that it wasn't my baby. It's gotten to the point that hubby thinks I have seperation anxiety with Bug. I hate leaving him at daycare, I don't like leaving him to go on a date night, I just want him with me all the time. I don't want anything to happen to him. Ever. He's started sleeping with us a few times as well. And then he goes and takes his first steps. In the mall, as I'm sitting there with a freind, stuffing those amazing pretzels down my throat he turns away from the chair he's been pounding on, lets go and takes his first step. I start bouncing in my chair saying "Oh my hell, oh my hell!!!" a few times and earned a few dirty looks from the grouchy old lady a few table down and start to cry. My baby is walking!!! Get down off your high horse lady, hell isn't a bad word, its a place, and this is a life milestone. He's growing up so fast. Makes me sad and excited all at the same time.

We still have no idea where we are going to move. All I know is that I have five weeks left of work before spending a week in Vegas, (can't wait) packing and cleaning my house for a week, celebrating Bugs big no. 1 and pulling out for (hopefully) greener pastures. I'm holding out for Oklahoma City, but hubby has his heart set on San Antonio. Does it make me a bad wife if I hope he doesn't get accepted there? I can just forsee so many problems with that particular location and the people that could be involved and I really think it is going to be best for our marriage if its just us for a while. No outside family or relations to reley on exclusivly. Just us. But that is a fight for another day and I'm hoping it never comes. Keeping fingers crossed just in case, though.